You Deserve Rest: Why Taking Time for Yourself Is Essential for Healing

As women and mothers, it’s easy to get caught in the cycle of doing, giving, and striving. We often find ourselves juggling the needs of everyone around us while barely leaving room to care for ourselves. For many of us in Missouri—especially those balancing the demands of family, work, and personal health—rest feels like a luxury we can’t afford or something we need to earn. But what if rest wasn’t a luxury? What if it was a vital part of healing, connecting, and truly taking care of ourselves?

My Personal Story: Finding My Way Back to the Mat

Today, I went to my first in-person yoga class in almost a year. To say I was nervous would be an understatement. Between tending to family needs and navigating some personal health challenges, my physical well-being looks very different now than it did before I got pregnant. The thought of walking into a room filled with people who might be more “put together” or “farther along” on their wellness journeys brought up all kinds of feelings—shame, fear, and self-doubt.

It would have been so easy to let those feelings keep me home. Familiar voices in my head whispered things like, “You’re not ready,” or, “There's so much do here around the house” or, “You're body isn't what it used to be” Those voices have kept me stuck before—pushing me to overdo it in an effort to prove I’m “enough” or convincing me to isolate myself in a haze of guilt and shame.

But this day felt different. Something inside me reminded me that simply showing up was enough. That I didn’t need to be the most flexible, the most fit, or the most anything. What my body needed was gentle movement, water, and community. So, I silenced those voices and went to class.

The Beauty of Being Present

The moment I unrolled my yoga mat, I felt a wave of relief. My body wasn’t performing at its peak, and that was okay. I moved slowly, listened to my breath, and honored what I could do rather than focusing on what I couldn’t. For the first time in a long time, I stayed present rather than comparing myself to others or worrying about “doing it right.”

And then, something wonderful happened. An old friend was teaching the class today. We smiled, hugged, and reconnected after class. We caught up on our lives, journeys, and desires for the next coming months. We both taught and learned something from each other that day from insights, suggestions, and support. It was beautiful. Something I didn't even know I needed.

That simple connection reminded me of how much I’d been missing—not just the physical benefits of yoga, but the sense of community and belonging that comes with it.

Had I stayed home and let my negative self-talk win, I would have missed this somatic moment of healing—for myself and with others. It wasn’t just about the yoga; it was about allowing myself to show up exactly as I was and finding connection in the process.

Why Rest Feels So Hard

Many of us struggle with rest because we’ve been conditioned to believe that our worth is tied to our productivity. This is especially true for moms, who often feel pressure to “do it all” while making it look effortless. Resting can feel indulgent or even irresponsible when there’s a never-ending list of tasks demanding our attention.

For me, the habit of pushing myself too hard goes back to childhood. I learned early on that achieving and overachieving were ways to earn love, approval, and safety. Slowing down or taking care of myself didn’t feel safe; it felt selfish. And even though I now know better, those old patterns still creep in, especially during times of stress or transition.

The Power of Listening to Your Body

Somatic therapy, trauma-conscious yoga, and other body-based healing practices have taught me that our bodies hold deep wisdom. They know when we’re tired, when we need comfort, and when we’ve been holding on to too much for too long. But our minds often override these signals, convincing us to keep pushing through.

In that yoga class, I finally let my body take the lead. It told me to move slowly, to drink water, and to rest in child’s pose when I needed to. It told me that just being there was enough. And when I listened, I felt a sense of calm and connection that I hadn’t experienced in a long time.

Letting Go of Shame and Guilt

Letting go of shame and guilt starts with giving yourself permission to be exactly where you are. Maybe you’re in a season of life where your body feels different, where rest feels hard, or where healing feels like an uphill battle. That’s okay. You don’t have to have it all figured out or get everything “right” to start taking care of yourself.

For Missouri and Utah women and moms, this might mean:

• Allowing yourself to take a nap without feeling lazy.

• Saying no to one more obligation so you can say yes to yourself.

• Asking for help when you’re overwhelmed.

• Choosing movement that feels nourishing rather than punishing.

• Letting yourself cry, laugh, or simply be in the moment without judgment.

Honoring Where You Are

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is that healing doesn’t happen when we’re constantly striving for the next thing. It happens when we pause, listen, and honor where we are right now. For me, that means acknowledging that my body is different post-pregnancy and that my well-being requires more gentleness and patience than it used to. It means recognizing that rest is not a luxury but a necessity for healing.

For you, it might mean:

• Letting go of comparisons to other moms, friends, or even your past self.

• Taking small steps toward self-care, like sitting outside with a cup of tea or journaling for five minutes.

• Finding a supportive community where you can be seen and heard.

• Exploring somatic practices like yoga, breathwork, or mindfulness to reconnect with your body’s wisdom.

  
  

The Gift of Connection

One of the most powerful aspects of that yoga class was the sense of connection it brought—not just to my body, but to others. Sharing a moment of presence and healing with my old friend reminded me that we’re not meant to do this alone. Healing often happens in community, whether it’s through a yoga class, a supportive group, or simply reaching out to a trusted friend.

If you’re feeling isolated or overwhelmed, know that you’re not alone. There are people and resources here in Missouri and Utah who can support you on your journey. Sometimes, the hardest step is the first one—but it’s also the most transformative.

Closing Thoughts

Letting go of shame and learning to rest without guilt is a process. It’s not about perfection; it’s about progress and self-compassion. Whether it’s through gentle yoga, somatic therapy, or simply taking a few deep breaths, you have the power to reconnect with yourself and honor where you are.

So, Missouri and Utah women and moms, here’s my invitation to you: Take a moment today to pause, breathe, and ask your body what it needs. Maybe it’s rest, movement, connection, or simply permission to feel what you’re feeling. Whatever it is, know that you’re enough—just as you are—and that healing starts when you give yourself the grace to be present.

Let’s move forward together, one gentle step at a time.

If you or someone who know wants to heal their pain at the roots, live a more authentic life, and be the woman and mother you and the dream of, reach out here for virtual somatic therapy with me. I serve women in Missouri and Utah.